STOP. LOOK. LISTEN.

Becca Bowen

Stop, look, and listen. It is something my mom told me when I was little to avoid getting run over by a car while crossing the street. Good advice! Well, it is also helpful to stop, look, and listen when you are trying to work out a problem with a friend.

Stop - Slow down when you respond to a friend that is angry. If you react to an accusation or a mean word right away, you may return a sarcastic remark.

Look - Watch their body language to see what feeling is behind the anger. A lot of times anger is the feeling we see but underneath someone is hurt, lonely, or embarrassed.

Listen - Give a friend time to explain what they are upset about without interrupting to give your side. Ask questions that start with "help me understand..." and show them you are listening to them by looking at them and staying attentive. After your friend feels heard, she will be more open to hearing your feelings about the situation.

Stop, look, and listen...good for cars and friends! Thanks, Mom!